How to Get Better at Things—Even If You Think You’re Just “Bad at It”

You ever feel like no matter how hard you try, you’re just slower at picking things up than everyone else? Like the world’s playing a game of catch-up—and somehow, you never got the instructions?

If that sounds familiar, darlin’, you’re not alone. Most people don’t feel like they’ve “got it together.” What we call being “bad at things” or “not good with new stuff” isn’t a fixed flaw. It’s just a gap between where you are and the support you need.

But let me say this clear: you are not broken. You don’t need fixing. You need a system—and maybe a bit of grace.

Here’s the real talk.

“Being bad at things” isn’t a personality trait—it’s a pattern.

Some folks look like they glide through life with ease. They seem quick, sharp, always one step ahead. But what you don’t see is the mountain of small, intentional choices behind that ease. They didn’t just wake up “good at stuff.” They practiced. Hard. And they kept adjusting until things clicked.

The truth is, most of us stumble. We forget things. We overthink. We freeze up. And when that happens again and again, we start telling ourselves a story: I’m just not the type who can do this.

That story? It’s heavy. And it’s optional.

If you want to stop feeling behind, start building habits that work for you—not against you.

Here’s where we ditch the shame and grab some tools.

One of the best ways to move forward is what I call a morning check-in. You don’t need fancy apps or perfect planners. Just take a quiet moment each day to write down four simple things:
• What you’ll do today. Be specific. Name it, and give it a deadline.
• What “done” looks like. Picture the result. How will it feel to have it off your plate? Who will it help?
• What might get in your way. Distractions? Doubts? Write ’em down.
• What you’ll do if that happens. Turn every “what if” into an “I’ll handle it by…”

This isn’t about control—it’s about clarity. And clarity calms the chaos.

Not all struggles come from the same place.

Sometimes it’s a planning problem—you’re doing things in a clunky order.
Sometimes it’s a knowledge gap—you’re learning from scratch, and that takes time.
And sometimes, it’s fear—of failure, of being judged, of not being “enough.”

Whatever the reason, here’s the fix: Don’t go it alone.

Ask questions—even the ones you think are silly. Borrow experience from someone who’s done it before. And when someone gives you feedback, take it as a gift—and do something good with it. That’s how we honor each other’s time.

Stop waiting to feel “ready.” Decide instead.

There’s no perfect day to start showing up differently. You won’t wake up one morning and magically feel capable. Confidence comes after action, not before.

So if you’ve been telling yourself, I’m just not that kind of person, I want you to try something different:

Tell yourself, I’m becoming the kind of person who…
• asks for help without shame
• makes lists that keep her grounded
• stops apologizing for learning slow
• builds systems that make life kinder

That’s not pretending. That’s practicing.

One last thing, love—

No one gets good at life overnight. It’s not a race. It’s a rhythm.

So don’t compare your progress to someone else’s highlight reel.
Don’t shame yourself for what you didn’t know yesterday.
Just ask: What’s one thing I can do today that future me will be thankful for?

That’s how change starts. Not with noise—but with one honest, intentional step.

So—what’s yours?

Ruby’s Bar — Pour truth. Breathe easier.